HELP!

A toaster is wanted. Inquire either me or Ju if you can help us out!

Busy Busy Busy

So Michael came by and ran me ragged for the week he was here. He is the most go-go person in the whole damn family.

Besides that a lot of stuff has been going on. Ju and I have been spending time together and it has been good. She just gets sassy sometimes and I give her an evil look and we laugh. So it is all good.

I've been getting a feel for music again; and by that I mean I want to buy ten albums, speakers, and music software. I have still been making music without all the other fancy stuff and it is very calming. I think I will grab a drawing tablet before any major music stuff though.

Staying in contact with friends in NC has been very interesting. I have two buddies (one mentioned in a previous post) whom are leaving everything behind in NC and heading to WV to be with their ladies. One of my ex-girlfriends was diagnosed with unspecified chick cancer. A high school friend ended up falling off a balcony three stories and will be lucky if he has use of his arms. Diesel is trying to find religion again. Duncan has not found a job yet. Vicky D is setting her self up again. And finally my premonitions came true once more and I got a call from someone that shouldn't have called me.
(why do contractions come up wrong on this thing?)

So thanks Michael for whipping me into shape and being a lot of fun. Thanks Ju for being a cool sister. Thanks music for having color again. And thanks to all my friends and family for being very interesting this past month.
I've had a lot of thoughts to write about the past couple of weeks but can't recall them now. I'll save them for later :)

Ughhh...

Gotta drive Ju to the airport at four, so I'll write stuff later. And I've had a few things I have wanted to write about but haven't had internet till now. So be chill Michael, there will be new content soon. :p

Moving...

so I can't be typing right now. And my steaks are done.

Face of Frodo...

Call to arms...

We do need more generations on this bandwagon Michael. (Espically you, Alex) Why I put this message up on my last blog is because I felt that this is the way I really talk. I think that us Neumanns shouldn't look at the blog as a way to talk to Neumanns but a way to talk to ourselves. We have too many addictions and anxieties to speak to each other in a face-to-face manner that cannot be solved in an informal blog. That is why I am trying to blog as much as possible, speaking to blood or not, so that we can grow as a family instead of apart from each other. (Even though Me and you are the only ones that are blogging at this point.)

I said that my family is what is keeping me going right now, so that is why I ask them to share their thoughts and feelings at this time. Especially from the younger generation, we need each other for support in dealing with something that this family has not dealt with ever: a whole generation of college hopefuls and post-graduates that needs guidance in our futures. What I see now are Neumanns repeating what previous Neumanns have done: Short education spurts resulting in more problems than to start with and drawn out education processes (decades long) where we learn academically, but not spiritually/personally.

Lets just write what we feel, whether it be greatly profound or just daily jibber-jabber, it will help the family in the long run.

Frodo

What I say to my friends in NC...

This is the last half of a message I sent to my friend Josh in NC after a few weeks of waiting for him to respond to my 'What you up to?' message. I think it really epitomizes what I am and have been doing these last few months.
This message has also made me realize how much my family means to me. Even though my friends have become part of my (Jason Neumann's) family, the Neumann/Velazquez family is what keeps me going now and more than ever. Thank you.



Paragraph five:
School is like pulling nails; every damn time I think about it. I am doing well and all but it still drives me insane. I'm in general computer science right now and I am hoping to find my specific field this semester. I've been completely isolating myself except from all of my family since I have been up in Chicago. So no girls. I am trying to root out the roots of my problems through deep isolation. Even though I have found that I have no answers as of yet for my apathy, depression, and addiction; I still feel that my time has not been in vain. I feel that I have grown more now than I ever would have back in NC and that if there is at least a solution to my problems it will be found here. My evidence is my Incubus station on my Pandora I am listening to right now (Which is off the chain I might add, the thing reads my fucking mind). I haven't listened to music like I do now since I was 15. It is saving my life right now.

Nothing big has happened with me except Elizabeth Bisher visiting me for a weekend last December seeing if she wanted to live with me (Got a real mature 'I am getting back with deadbeat Nick so I'm gonna stick it out in nowhere Asheboro and not try to better myself) by form of not answering my calls. That is the answer for trying to help a friend with an opportunity to get away from it all. W/e.
Then Diesel came and we had enough fun together for six months even though he was only here for 1 week. For you, I think Sean is for you. For me, I have Diesel and Duncan. We all feel each others' pain, and I really feel it from Duncan and Sean. If I could clump us five into a group, they are the ones that need the most support right now. I just hurt and hurt for those boys right now.
After Diesel left I went to a hippy party with my Cousin Emily at her college and it was off the chain. I ended up throwing up at the end of the night several times due to a forced kegstand, but that is just proof that the night kicked ass. That is why I am happy with not finding new friends here yet and just sticking with my family: My family has really good connections and I want to become close to them again like I was before I moved to NC.
Not to say that NC was bad for me; I would not be alive today if I had not moved there (Straight up truth right there). It is just that I needed NC friends then and I need family now; even though I miss my friends like I fear cancer.

Postlude:
I miss you too Josh, along with all our other crazy friends. I hope to come down to NC before the summer (when I am definitively coming down) so I would really like to chill with you then in A-town. We need to share struggles. And if you guys ever want to visit the windy city, my place always has vacancy. There is nothing like traveling to make yourself new (The west coast gave me Elizabeth, Costa Rica gave me Shannon), so don't have hesitation if you want to use me for a place to crash when visiting Chicago. I love visitors.
Seriously though Josh, you just made my month. May I suggest that during this transitional period for you that you should blog about your endeavors. My cousin has made me start blogging. Partly for him to survive this part of his life; partly because he knows Neumanns have problems communicating and that blogging is an easy way to let it all out. So I will suggest that to you now in hope that you will communicate more, blogging or not, and grow because of it.


Stay in touch brother,
Frodo

Hungry in Schaumburg, Il

NOT ANY MORE, I FOUND GROUND BEEF! Let the good times roll.

Trapped in a Caddy

Alright so yesterday I was driving down to Midway to pick up Ju when 4 blocks away from the airport I get car problems. I spent 2 hours in a sketchy neighborhood sitting in a broken down caddy. Sadly it looks like the transmission so we are gonna have to do some grinding of the mental gears to fix this problem. So with the battery dead in one car and the tranny out in the other I'm stuck walking to class. Fun stuff.

Edit: Also now I'm stuck in Schaumburg running low on groceries. Someone feed me.

Something that actually made me speechless

This actually happened to me about a week ago but was an event that really hit home to me. Sadly a bit of back story comes first.

Edit: Damn this is long

This story starts back my last semester in high school in NC where I met Kapheirne. Between the couple of times me and her dated from then till now we had a very spiritual relationship (in lack of a better descriptor). We spent the months being very close to each other and then spending a few months desperately mad at each other always due to our differences in communication. Not to say that we didn't communicate well, we were very agreeable with each other (why we clicked so well in the first place), but when something did come between us I would want to sit down and resolve it and she would want to shove off and find something new.

So it was like so up until I moved up to Chicago. Before I left and for long afterwards me and her were well in sync and stayed in touch. We started talking less when she found a new boyfriend back in NC, which I didn't have a problem with. What I did have a problem with was that she did not tell me about him, as if something like this wasn't an important thing to tell to one of your best friends. So when I come down to NC I get my first actual brief to the situation and I feel rather betrayed that she tried to keep this now longer-lasting relationship from me when I just want to know the guy so all of us can have fun together. Well I do get to know him abruptly when I visit and me and him are the same dude. Both skinny computer geeks with many of the same body abnormalities and set-types. We actually click so well me and him hang out by ourselves without Katherine, which ticks her off a bit. O well, big whoop.

So now comes our big disambiguation. The day before I leave Asheboro, where they live, we decide to party a touch and Mark (the boyfriend) picks up a bit of alcohol and we reside to drinking and playing rock band at his place. We are all having a good time when she takes the initiative to start getting intimate with Mark, while I'm there in the room. Now, the ground rules for having an out of town guest over is to hold off on such things until the guest has left or at least passed out, so this pisses me off and I end up drinking heavily with his roomie who isn't (not the most fun). So between her not telling me about Mark, them going off on my last day in town leaving me to drink alone, and the drink itself I decide it is time for me to crash on the couch since I will not have anything nice to say. Well before I pass out I did have something to unconsciously say to Mark, which was "She will ruin you" or "She will ruin your life" or something, I don't remember nor did I every feel that way. I felt that he was worse for her because he was jobless and living off of credit cards. Anywhoo, what was said was said and I didn't know about it till morning when I went to say my goodbyes to her and her family, where I did apologise.

So, we don't speak for a while cause I knew she was pissed and I knew to give her space before I make more sh*t. I finally do contact her because a good friend of both of ours was heading back to Asheboro and was very depressed (parents splitting) and couldn't get hold of her to plan something. So I told her such and later that night after that exchange she told me to never try to contact her again. And what I hate the most is when people don't talk about the issue and just get pissy. So I was pissed for a good bit after that. Did I feel led on, somewhat. Did I feel betrayed, yes. Did I feel unresolved, definitely. So time passes, I end up drawing my own conclusion and live on. She and Mark get more serious over the next few months, up towards engagement which I hear through my grapevine. And because I do like Mark I am hopeful for them because we all know how most young couples end up.

Now comes the recent. They do end up splitting up and Katherine and I have this only short exchange:
Frodo: Wtf I thought you guys were going strong for a young couple?
K: Well, this and that and we split up and it was hard.

Kool, I finally had my final resolution and went on my merry way. Through my grapevine I still do hear of the crazy things she has/had been up to, making me confident in that resolution.

Then last week came the speechlessness. So I was chillen at the apartment, minding my own business when I get a couple of texts from a number I'm not familiar of. It ends up being Mark and the short and long of the messages are:
Katherine is a mean conniving little b*tch...I broke up with her like three weeks ago and she's still manipulating me...she can't let anything go, she's so insecure... I should have listened to you.

At first I looked at my phone as if to console a regular friend but I was found speechless. That part in italics is what got me. Something that I never meant to say and said in some sort of spite that I have long forgotten has come full circle like some sort of bad Hollywood foreshadowing and bit me in the ass. It made me laugh out loud.

So the moral of the story is: Vodka is bad

(
To whom it may concern:
Mark- Sorry if this comes back to you but for my own therapy I had to write about it
Katherine- If you have any grievances with my telling of the story just tell me and I will amend it, I don't have anything to hide. Also don't knock Mark, he is my homeboy.
Anyone else involved in this story- You already know most of what is told here so laugh with me at the last bit with the text messages, I haven't told you guys that part yet.
)

This is for you Michael

Ok, so this morning has been a good one, if you ignore the whining of the dogs. But, i got up and started tittering around on the computer and out of the corner of my eye i spot my long lost aviator sunglasses on the desk. This was a big development for me because I have missed these sunglasses since I helped uncle Eric insulate in Naperville and I've been squinting while driving ever since. Then not so long after I look down to see my computer supply box had been knocked over (damn dogs). When I went to clean the mess made I saw my passport which I thought I had left in North Carolina! That was a lifesaver because it is a lot easier to flash my passport than it is to bring my birth certificate and three forms of id when doing something official.

Being a first blog I will type about more than me being horrible at organization. As the family should know me and Ju are living together and are having a lot of fun when we aren't having car problems. What I am really excited about now is the new place Ju found for us. I haven't been there or seen a floor plan but when me and her had a pow-wow about it she sold me with a gas stove and screened in porch! It is a house too so I can blast my music without worrying about foreigners knocking on my door about it.

Edit: The house isn't in Schaumburg, it is closer to the city near 90 and Harlem, right at the end of the blue line as I am told.

I am going to school right now at Harper and it is driving me insane. All I want to do is work with computers but I am stuck with lame American government classes and "learn how to type 8{" kinds of prerequisites. Every time I think about it I feel like my nails are being pulled out. Seriously, I've spent the equivalent of two semesters in programing and graphic design,why am I learning how to use Microsoft Word? What keeps me going right now are Ju's words of wisdom.

So those are the major things going on with me. Besides that I think I am going to be building computers and push them on the ignorant masses. I just want a little extra bit of scratch to have fun with :)

Jason